ode to beb part 2

orang slalu kate it'll get easier. tipu. no matter how many times i do it, saying goodbye to beb is always painful.

rase cam dah beribu2 kali.

mase almost break ntah brape kali, mase break btol2, every time aku pegi toulouse, die datang limoges. everytime pon cakap lepas nie dah tak datang. lepas nie dah tak call. lepas nie dah tak msn.

even kat malaysia. aku cakap dah tanak call. die cakap i'll stop now, have a good life.
hampeh tak lekat.

because we're best friends. konon gak ar. used to sharing our thoughts together. used to asking for each other's opinion.

yesterday, i actually listened to myself while i was defending myself to lynn.
memang a load of crap.
and it's like a million situations sume org slalu cite kat aku. and reaction aku slalu : please ade self-respect! ape2 pon die ade girlfriend k.

there's such a thing as sisterhood. you have to always put yourself in the other girl's shoes. bukannye aku tak sedar.

so i'm saying goodbye again. for good.

it feels like a betrayal of a different kind. sbab aku pakse die promise we wouldn't be strangers. sbab aku promise that i wouldn't desert him.
nak buat camne? this friendship sedikit sebanyak mencederakan aku.

sbab i've never seen him so happy. and we promised to take care of each other. and he's so gonna screw this up if i go the other way.

hey, tak ya dramatik bole tak? lagi pon hidup lagi simple kalo aku tak pening kepale.