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août 02, 2009

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"When you hurt people, they begin to love you less."

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need a new but de vie.

i have friday off. i had friday off. i have frittered away my friday aimlessly. next week only got one exam so no motivation to study. did some project with jun tadi but mostly, my head's spinning sbab baru spend 4 and a half hours dengan jun main ps2. macam zombie. i need a new but de vie. a reason to wake up in the morning. recently, the only reason to force myself out of bed is school and the fear of exams. i can't shop because : a. i'm broke (tapi korang tau tak duit jpa baru masuk?) b. i have too many clothes, and everything i need. c. shopping is a cheap thrill, senseless and utterly unsatisfying. d. kene kumpul duit nak kawin. (serious.) i need a hobby. a hobby that won't take away my money. like gardening (what garden? syikin you kill plants with your eyes.) or knitting. or plan cool adventurous things like hot air ballooning and bungee jumping. carpe diem. "........" pathetic. let's just go back to being aimless.

aku slalu bengang di waktu pagi

recently bile bangun pagi aku slalu bengang. bengang dengan beb. bengang yang teramat sangat. sebenarnye aku bengang dgn diri sendiri.....why am i such a pushover sometimes? aiyo syikin, stick to the plan lar. no matter how much you try to justify, and berape byk kate2 manis ko nak tabur kat aku....i won't be okay with this. sbab tu hari2 pon there will be an undercurrent of anger. ko nak macam tu? i get your side. i do, which is more than you can hope for in most girls. i see that and yet i do still have a sense of sisterhood. walau aku tak kenal the other person in this story. sbab slambe je ko nak ignore perasaan org laen just because you're lonely. the "i'm just human" excuse ain't gonna fly. to err is human but kalo dah buat all the time tu sengaja name die. from my side : i'm not some random person yang flirt dengan bf org k. i'm your ex-girlfriend. i was with you 2 years, i know all of your flaws. i've seen you at your best and at your worst...

Noddy's learning some manners in school

Saying "Excuse me" especially when she pushes me aside in the shower so she can arrange the shampoo bottles in the shape of an attacking army. "Don't like". She used to say just No when she doesn't want food. Then she learnt to say don't want. Now she's graduated to don't like. Like, everything also don't like. Parenting is so tiring. At least she's also learnt to say thank you. At least sejuk hati mama after losing a 10 minutes battle over not having cookies for dinner. Well, she flippantly said thank you and then ran off to watch Johnny Johhny Yes Papa on TV.

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