airports in malaysia. for some reason i keep going during haji season. last year, mase balik for mama's tahlil pon mase org balik haji. you have no idea.
hari tu nak pegi bangkok from senai, i heard org selawat ramai2 menyambut and menghantar org haji aku jd sedih sgt2. like sorang2 menangis kat tgh2 departure hall. up until then i forgot it was haji season. honestly, i just sat staring with tears streaming down my face. orang mesti pelik.
and all this while repeating to myself i'm okay, i'm okay, i'm okay.
i really regret it. bak kata mama, nangis air mata darah pon tak guna. sbb aku tak balik pon mase bln 9 or bln 10 last year. kedekut tanak blk 2 minggu. dua minggu yg akan regret selama2nye.
how has home been? okay, surprisingly. i don't think much has changed and this change is better than the alternative. tapi dlm bilik, hari2 tak bole tido igt mama. every night dengar mama panggil. sblom tido dengar mama kate mama nak tido dgn dianalah.
bile tgk jemaah haji bole bygkan mama excited and i wish i could see it.
i really regret it. bak kata mama, nangis air mata darah pon tak guna. sbb aku tak balik pon mase bln 9 or bln 10 last year. kedekut tanak blk 2 minggu. dua minggu yg akan regret selama2nye.
how has home been? okay, surprisingly. i don't think much has changed and this change is better than the alternative. tapi dlm bilik, hari2 tak bole tido igt mama. every night dengar mama panggil. sblom tido dengar mama kate mama nak tido dgn dianalah.
bile tgk jemaah haji bole bygkan mama excited and i wish i could see it.
i can see it happening : just like always, i'm never going to get over this like i don't get over heartbreak. because i never mourn things properly. i don't know how to. i feel very meredith grey right now. so cacat. but how can it be denial when i talk about it all time?
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